Divorce Crazy

@Caitlinconstan's Sasha has better things to do
My friend Jenn, also a relatively recent & young divorcée, has a term she calls divorce crazy. 

The definition is self explanatory. And she was smart enough to foresee it before it occurred, so she planned for it.

It's poignant for me because in a marriage that didn't work, I found that my biggest enemy was not the partner who didn't fit me but my own wacky self.

Jenn is the queen of serial monogamy. I've always known her to be in a very long-term relationship. Or in long-term periods-of-abstaining-from-long-term-relationships. She's my model for the ideal mentally healthy & balanced person, which I fail up against time and again.
From a recent im chat:

Jennifer: need to be celibate for at LEAST the next six months for real!
me:  omg what if i die! (not from, you know, but like get hit by a bus?)
Jennifer:  What if you totally get your stuff together and work out all your issues? And go on to a happier healthier life??
me:  Right. I guess that would be fun too.
Jennifer:  LOL

Thus far I've made my divorce crazy work for me. One of the first things I did when I felt like I had my life back was contact every friend I had dropped or drifted away from, including a few ex's. 

Not in that wacky High Fidelity tell-me-what's-wrong-with-me kind of way. (I know that much about myself by now.) More like when-we-agreed-to-be-friends-I-meant-it-now-let's-get-beers-and-not-make-out.  

It's nice to be reminded that just because a romantic partnership didn't work out doesn't mean a friendship can't bloom. Something special still exists in that person who initially drew you close. 

No comments:

Post a Comment